My Parents are So Overprotective

The good news is that you’re not alone. I guarantee you’re not the only teen with food allergies who feels as if his or her parents are overprotective. I’ll even go so far as to guarantee that, even in a group of teens who don’t have food allergy, you still won’t be the only one who feels that his or her parents are overprotective. Growing pains ... everyone can relate.

Granted, that doesn’t necessarily make it easier to let it roll off your shoulders when your parents call to check up on you while you’re visiting friends. Nor does it make you pine away any less for a little personal space. The only way you’ll get what you want, however, is to express your feelings — calmly and patiently — to your parents.

First, think about the situation enough that you can really look at it objectively. If it helps to write down your thoughts, make a list of recent times when you felt your parents were being overprotective. Then, next to each item on your list, note the ways you wish they had acted differently. Be realistic — telling them to never ask where you’re going or who you’re going with is probably not a viable option; asking them to trust that you are where you say you’ll be is a more reasonable goal.

As the next step, talk to them. Tell them you feel they’re being overprotective, ask them to give you a little more personal space, and explain to them which actions make you feel crowded. Listen to their response. This is very important.

Try to understand why they’re being protective and why they quiz you about your plans. By discussing the situation with your parents calmly and rationally, you’ll show them how adult you are, and, therefore, they will be much more apt to trust you with more responsibility. Plus, if each of you tries to see the other’s perspective, you’ll be much more likely to form a good, trusting relationship.

Finally, take it all in stride. Parents are protective. It’s in their job description. Besides, it gives you something to gripe about with friends.